Friday, April 11, 2014

Lots of changes

I haven't written in months. I haven't posted in awhile. Been super busy with work, kids and household chores.
Here are some changes going on : hubby has two job offers in Florida and really likes one. So we are moving to Florida. Don't know the date just yet. Lots of variables I won't bore you with. Hubby is done with working in the cold winter weather outside each year. I don't blame him. It will be nice with no snow. My feelings on this is I'm excited for the new adventure but nervous of the change. I am nervous about not having any friends or family there. My hubby has a few cousins there and I do have one friend there but all are not close. I have lived in different states before but not for long. I have lived here in Illinois along time. Not that have a ton of time to hang out during the week since I'm working. Which is nice most of the time.

Mysterious has been having a super hard time for the last few months OK few years. Teenage years have been hard with her. She is feeling the awkwardness of the aspergers when it comes to social outcomes and the mood swings added from her hormones on to her bipolar.  The kid has it hard. But the last few months have been extreme talking back,  mouthing off,  swearing,  aggressiveness,  being violent and destroying our property. Its bad. We work with her therapist and psychologist and switch up punishments. Nothing has worked. We have given incentive. Nothing. She has flat out told us she wants no rules or to be told what to do. That is so not happening. That would be like lord of the fly's. Um no. This week she has tried a little more. Had a great therapy session and participated. Woot woot !!
I am proud of her. I just want her to not blame others an be happy. I just want her to see and know she can change. She is capable of it. I hope she keeps at it.

Texas is super smart. He has been telling me in baby language when he wants me to get up so he can show me what he wants from the fridge to eat. He will then go to  his chair to eat. He loves to wash his hands. He loves to play with his sisters and dance. He is getting so big. He plays games with me. He is super strong. He is full of personality. I love seeing him playing with Evilcious. They are super close with each other. He loves to play with play kitchens especially ovens. He likes to stick food in there and close it. Future chef maybe? He loves to play hide and seek and chase me. He is like his daddy where he wants to take things apart and see how they work.

Evilcious is super happy that winter is over. Even more happy that we told her we are going to move where there is no snow. Yes a child got super happy we will never see snow again. Because snow means we are stuck inside or playing at the library (which is fun) but not outside.
Everyone seems to be in better moods now that the weather has changed and we go outside every day. I hate cold and snow. It's beautiful to look at but icky to drive in and be in. 

I have so many thoughts racing through my head lately. So many thoughts that lead to fear, anxiety and have for some reason thought of death a lot. Not mine and not that I ever want something to happen to anyone but just wondering what would happen if my husband died or my kids. And just being super aware that is a possibility in life. Not saying it never was before. I think with moving on my mind my anxiety's and my addictions are playing tricks on my mind. I will be OK because I have great cyber friends to talk too plus my best friend is my hubby. How great is that.

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